Neither Sex nor City

I have been watching way too much Sex and the City recently, and it has made me very pensive about my impending future. In ten years I will be in my thirties... ten years ago I was only just getting out of my first decade. Obviously I imagine every girl thinks that she is the Carrie character, the fashionista with cute flaws and little luck with keeping men (though good fortune in finding men), a self indulgent let’s write about my life, and actual success in doing so. The truth is, I really do think this is me – except I’m 21, and despite my wit, am seriously lacking in the ‘ex’ department except a handful of puppy love and failed crushes and one huge heartbreak, also I can’t see my little blog-ettes really taking off and being turned into either a) a column or b) a book, let alone c) inspriring a tv show and 2 films... Is this me lacking self confidence? Or am I just a realist...

So my dream is Carrie, but maybe its better in reality to be Miranda – the career woman who’s really independant... this is going to be my new aim. The sad thing is that before the [much] aforementioned heartbreak I used to be the Charlotte character, innocent, naive, believing in love and marriage and soulmates etc etc. Sadly I have never been the Samantha character...yet.

This week I told off a 3 year old French boy and felt really good about myself, I also sleep-shouted “what happened to you?!” at my roommate, poured fruit juice on my cereal, and laughed out loud when i saw at work when someone came from Espoo (POO) – Finland. I think perhaps my dreams of the glitzy-glamourous 30 something independant and sexually active, stylish woman with a successful career in media is a massive, unachievable dream for me. Afterall, I am me. And look at the last paragraph I’ve written... I am the silly clumsy cute funny friend. Doomed? Or just about original / weird enough to make a success of my random musings? Only time will tell...

Vex & The Katy

I realised that I haven't posted a blog in absoloutely ages, I apologise! but the trouble is, I'm working down in Provence with very little internet access, and by the time I get round to going on the interent, catching up on facebook and American tv series, I can scarecly be bothered to write about my life.

I've been thinking alot recently about what I want to be when I grow up... The trouble is I really wanted to be a radio dj, writer, or teacher. These three things seemed to be the new top 3 jobs for everyone, forget "lawyer" "doctor" "vet" its all "media" "rich" and "famous" (or teacher).

So what will make me stand out? I like to think my wit, but is there room for another bridget jones wannabe? Could I write a book? what about? Been as my blogs are few and far between, it appears as though I have a lack of commitance and nothing very interesting to say...

I had been thinking along the lines of "diary of a hypocondriac" - a semi-autobiographical tale... or just generally "The Thoughts of a Twit" or something along those lines...
These are the two things that I seem to be making myself famous for: always being ill or having hurt myself somehow and asking the most random unanswerable questions like "if an ant fell off a 6foot wall would it die?"

Could I turn my weird and complex complexes into a career? should I publish more of them here or might someone steal my ideas? tricky world..

anyway for the mean time I think we can all rest assured that I am going no where fast and that its going to stay that way for the foreseeable future. (Could I have used many more clichés in that sentence?)

ps: In actual news of my life and not just the ramblings of my inner thoughts - I spent my two days off work this week up in Paris, met up with some family and saw some friends, which has been great, and I'm hoping to come back next month or in August to go to Disneyland with Aurelie!

à plus tard,
Mlle Blake